confusion

feeling better about life and myself in general lately, i realize that my recent downfall was caused by confusion. aware of my strength as an individual, i still found myself weak and wondering because i was confused. confused because i had mistaken what i need with what i want. these are two very different things. 

there are very few cases in which what i need and what i want is all the same. 

for those closest to me, i think one of those is beyond obvious. ; ]

oops. teehee... not trying to give any hints.

with a sneer,

bravebird.

oh eight pledge.

dear new year, 

  i'm making a whole list of feasible resoultions instead of making one huge, over-the-top, impractical resoultion. all these resolutions will have one purpose -- to form habits which will in turn develop a lifestyle. this lifestyle will ensure that the resolutions listed become a part of this year, and the years to come. my resolutions of the past are almost always forgotten by the time spring rolls around, if not sooner. this lifestyle, these resolutions, are for improvement and i want to keep moving forward because the best is yet to come. 

1. Refuse to be lazy.

Lazy implies procrastination. You still have things to do, but are too lazy to do them. Being lazy is often confused with relaxation. Relaxation implies accomplishment. Relaxation is rewarded to those who are not lazy. Completing scheduled tasks such as chores, business/academic affairs, and self maintenance on a regular basis will save you more time in the long run. Letting tasks pile up in your mind not only increases the time to complete many tasks but it requires more effort and it can cause stress. Laziness creates stress. Pure relaxation is stress free, so get your shit done first. 

2. Keep your living space clean. 

Keep your room as clean as can be. Remove all clutter and throw away everything you haven't used, worn, seen, or remembered you still had. Tidy often. Tidying here and there lessens your cleaning efforts later on. When your environment is clean, you allow new positive energy to flow around you. 

3. Set the mood and welcome positive energy.

Keep scented candles lit. The pleasant fragrances have an amazing affect on mood. Try it, you'll know what I'm talking about. Your good mood will create an aura around you. It is a positive experience. Light a tea light candle before going to bed. It'll be out before morning without any harm and it is extremely relaxing. 

4. Spend time in solitude. 

Set some time alone everyday. No matter how busy your schedule, or what you need to do. Take at least thirty minutes to sit alone and do something that relaxes you. I would suggest having a cup of hot tea and reading a book while listening to some jazz, soul, or even classical music. I could reccommend you a whole list of artists, but try Etta James, Kenny G, Amel Larrieux, Norah Jones, Corrinne Bailey Rae, and Sade. Try writing or blogging. Clearing your mind is also a great form of relaxation. 

5. Remember your purpose.

Every morning, get up and start your day. Remind yourself of what you plan to do. Think about what you want to accomplish. Stick to it and at the end of the day before you go to bed, remember your purpose. You will sleep much better knowing you were productive and did what you had to do. Make this a ritual before you sleep and when you wake up.

6. Excercise your mind, body, and spirit.

Take time to do some leisure reading. As much as I hate reading, I've alloted a certain time in the day, mainly when I get in bed before i sleep at night, to read something I'm interested in. I keep a book in my purse and by my bed so I can read when there's downtime during the day. I like self help books. That's usually the section at the bookstore that I go to first. Seeing others' point of view of stuff that may be helpful for everyone is interesting. I sometimes even try to find time to put other people up on something I learned or I find valuable. You will also find it useful to write a reflection on what you've read. 

Some people find it hard to get to the gym on a regular basis during the week or  some do not have access to one so try doing a few exercises that doesn't require any equipment in the privacy of your own room. You may feel more comfortable and you can't say you don't have time to. You will find it refreshing to taking just ten minutes to stretch and do a few excercises regularly during the week. You will also find that you have more energy during the day. 

Lastly, pray often. 

7. Keep in touch.

No one wants to be lonely. Keep your friends close and make time to socialize. Pay a friend a visit or phone a good friend you haven't spoken to in a while. Take care of your friends, they will take care of you.

If you don't live at home with your parents, try to call them everyday. It makes them happy to know that you're thinking about them and want to talk or that you called just to check in. Your relationship with them will be healthier. Nothing is better than having a happy family. Not money, not status, not cars, not grades, not your career. Do what you have to do, but remember family first. They will be there for you, do not isolate or alienate yourself. Again, keep them close. My family keeps me sane. 

8. Maintain yourself.

Stay clean. Good hygiene is important and leaves impressions on those you encounter daily. You always want to leave a good impression. A cleanly face and a nice smile are pleasant. Wash your sheets weekly, keep up with your laundry, get a massage, keep your nails polished, shave often, get waxed as often as you should, put on some makeup, fix your hair, and get dressed at the start of each day. When you look good, you feel good. This creates confidence. Own your beauty and own your self-worth. It's attractive. 

9. Don't forget to smile. 

Everyone loves a person who smiles. A beautiful smile rejects any negative energy. A study has shown that people who smile are more inclined to laugh or find something funny. Humor is the best medicine. Carry a smile wherever you go. People will be attracted by your aura. You will meet more people and people will be inclined to speak to you even if they do not know you. Smiles attract positive encounters with people throughout the day. I know this to be true. Don't forget your manners. Greet everyone you come into contact with even if they seem like they're having a bad day. Though they may not respond in the way you'd expect, be content that you tried your best to stay positive. This is key to being personable. 

10. Enjoy yourself. 

Make time to have fun with friends. Go out, watch a movie, go bowling. Do things you and your friends enjoy together. Bonding with friends is a beautiful thing. Even if you are busy or too tired, try to find time once a week to get out and let loose a little, by doing whatever it is you like to do (cough cough, nudge nudge). After all, when with good company, you're guaranteed to have a good time and you won't regret it. 

11. Live in the moment. 

Cherish the day. The present is a gift. Carpe diem, "Seize the day." The list of cliches are endless. This resolution is self-explanatory. But here is a quote by Buddha, "The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, or anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly." Word. 

with hopes of a blessed year, 

bravebird.